What can we say about our future?
by Sansai
Summary: Heero is shown a future where that he cannot change.


Heero Yuy shed his clothes as he entered the room he shared with his lover, Duo Maxwell. He had just retured from a mission that had required his abilites, it was a solo mission. Heero stopped right before the bed of his lover, his eyes taking in the sight of his lover sleeping peacefully, the thin sheet wrapped around his lithe form. He sighed slowly in pure exhaustion, though the perfect soldier would never show such a blatant weakness.  
  
Emotion, his mind whispered, another weakness, weakness for the one laying across the bed. I would never let you come to any harm, my Duo.  
  
Heero sighed a second time, this time in emotion for Duo, making a little gutteral noise, that sounded similar to a growl.  
  
Duo stirred on the bed, opening one eye, he looked up toward Heero. "Koibito, glad that you made it home safely." Duo unwrapped himself from the sheet, now slightly more awake. He lifted the sheet and motioned Heero to come to bed. Duo wrapped his hand in his hair and rubbed it over his lips.  
  
Heero set down on the bed, a couple inches in front of Duo, who wrapped his arms around him, locking him in a soft enbrace from the back. Duo laid his chin on his lover's shoulder, nipping slightly at the ear.  
  
"Duo, I'm glad to be back in your arms," that's where I belong, his mind added. "My mission was simple." Heero turned his head to lock lips with his lover. "Duo, can I just hold you tonight?"  
  
"Well, even my sex drive needs a rest, but I suppose I can handle no sex tonight," Duo mumbled into the ear of his lover, a feral grin crossing his lips. He placed a small kiss on his lovers' shoulder.  
  
Heero reached around and lightly smacked Duo's butt. "I'm serious, I just want to be near you."  
  
"Fine," Duo laid back on the bed. He fanned his hair out over his side and twisted it in front of him. He moved so that he was on his side, to allow Heero to spoon behind him.  
  
Heero laid down, slipping one arm under Duo's side and then pulling him close, drawing across his stomach, his fingers playing over his navel. He slipped his legs between Duo's, entertwining them together. Heero moved Duo's hair over his body, making it a second cover.  
  
Duo sighed in his arms, causing a slight shudder to go through Heero. Heero moved his free hand across Duo's chest. Duo moved- placing his hand into Heero's- and raised the locked hands to his lips to place a small kiss on the knuckles of his lover.  
  
"Ai shiteru, Duo Maxwell." Heero whispered into his koi's neck, nuzzling the skin there.  
  
"Ai shiteru, Heero Yuy, forever." Duo wrapped his other hand in Heero's other and wrapped himself in those arms. He closed his eyes and a small smile played across his lips as he drifted back into the land of sleep.  
  
Heero stayed awake a few minutes longer, just enjoying this feel of is his lover in his arms.  
  
I wish we could stay this way forever, this is all that matters in this war. A soldier must accept love in whatever form it takes. Relena, what you call your obsession after me is not love. When this war ends, and how this war ends, she will ask me to be at her side. It is logical, rational, the one who the colonies respect most along with the former queen of the world, the respect of Earth and the colonies within her hands, shall be there to create a new unity. The soldiers having their say through the mouth of Heero Yuy, hero that saved Earth. Oh, my precious Duo Maxwell, I love you, my heart and body and soul belong to you. Please never forget that in the time to come, no matter how I may act.  
  
Heero closed his eyes and silenced his thoughts, focusing on the heartbeat of the one in his arms. Sleep slowly came to him.  
  
Unknowst to the two on the bed, two more figures stood in the darkness of the room- an angel and death. One with beautiful white wings the color of innocence, of a million children laughing in glee. The hair of this angel unruly, of a shade of brown like that of trees, the very bark of life being his hair. The eyes of this angel reflected the blue of the morning dawn, of that spot where the color of the sun meets the darkness of night, not dark, not light, but in that transition stage. The skin, a shade of a god, his own light marblezed by time and the darkness that is his mate. The angel's lips were the immortal-ized lips of a thousand greek statues- sensual, red and full of promise. The body of this angel promised more then a simple pleasure, but the pleasure of a thousand eras, of civilizations falling and civilizations rising.  
  
The angel turned and drew death into his arms.  
  
Death had wings the color of a crismon stained darkness, not night, but of something deeper, not blood stained, but something thicker. Deaths' hair is a thick braid the shade of chestnut, a symbol of life, though the entertwining strands each were for a piece of life that has died and become part of something greater, the unity after death between people, the peace afterward. Death's eyes were a chosen color of purple, the color of the dusk, the purple of the night claiming the last bit of light that would shine upon the planet, light that became dark. His skin was a bronzed shade, the last bit of light that was claimed by the shadows is remembered, the light that tainted the darkness.  
  
The angel that captured death with something greater then anything material, the light of an angel is greater then the sun. The angel is the light that tainted the darkness, and the darkness of death had cast a shadow over the light of the angel, something is shared, just as something is taken away.  
  
Light is greater then the darkness.  
  
Death's lips showed promise of darkened nights, of a bed tainted with the beauty of something unreal, something greater then humanity can understand. The body of death is one that also promised more then simple pleasure, but also pain, not only the pain of loss, but the pain of pleasure.  
  
"Their desteny is the same, yet so much pain will occur before they finally reach it." Death whispered into the lips of light.  
  
The angel and death embrace, their wings spread-touching so they are almost dancing.  
  
"Can't Duo be spared of this pain?" Death asked slowly.  
  
"They will be seperated, the future needs them at this time. This life time is not their time to be together, later they will find each other. When you embrace Heero, Duo will be waiting, they will find each other in the next incarnation."  
  
"Do they not enough now, to be allowed a little more time together, before this part of fate has to arrive." Death quivered slightly.  
  
"Duo will never truely be alone, neither will Heero, just not together."  
  
"Their next incarnation is even more important than this one. They shall become one-forever, just not now."  
  
The two of them slowly disapeared as two messangers slowly fazed into the room, that of a little girl and that of a young boy. The two messangers floated to the side of the bed that Duo and Heero were facing and made themselves able to look down on those two.  
  
"Duo" the young boy muttered, reaching out to touch his sleeping face, "good choice of  
  
name."  
  
"Heero" the little girl mumbeled. "I forgive you, neesan." She bowed her head in respect for these two.  
  
"Let our job be done," the boy whispered to the little girl next to him.  
  
They faded out into the darkness, having one destination and one mission to complete.  
  
+++++++  
  
Heero Yuy dreampt that he was still in the arms of his Duo, he could not feel anything, all that was needed was the presence of his Duo to make his life complete.  
  
"Ai shiteru," he whispered, he was wide awake, he felt his body start to go numb as his sences momentairly blacked out.  
  
He felt his eyes lower as a sudden drowsiness wrapped around him. Heero opened his eyes again, almost reluctently, as if his stregnth had been spent.  
  
The room was dark, no light was cast from any direction. Heero's physical sences told him that he was wearing his familar spandax and green tee. He found himself standing alone in what he precieved to be a room. Heero tried moving, but found his limbs stiff and unresponsive to any movement that he willed.  
  
"Why?" a voice whispered into the air. Heero turned his head slightly, his sences attempting to read the room for life. The voice felt like it was all around him.  
  
"Why?" the voice asked agin. This time Heero recognized the tiny voice. His eye twitched as he recogonized it as the voice of the little girl that he had killed those years before, all unecessary death.  
  
"It was my mission, then an unnecesary waste of life," Heero's voice monotonly said into the air.  
  
"Even a soldier needs emotion, " her tiny voice whispered.  
  
Memories of the doctor speaking that the perfect soldier has no need for emotion. His words floated over him:  
  
"There is no need for the perfect soldier to feel compassion."  
  
"Why?" the girls' voice asked again, more sternly, but still in a childish way.  
  
"I was trained to be a soldier," Heero spoke softly, allowing a hint of emotion to enter his voice.  
  
"Why?" the the darkness in the shape of a girl's voice asked agin.  
  
"I had no family, no life, being a soldier was my new life, my reason for living," Heero lapsed back into his monotone voice.  
  
"Why?" the darkness child asked again, this time the voice was older, still a child, yet maturing.  
  
"What did I have to lose?" Heero whispered lightly.  
  
"Why?" the voice had changed again, the child had become a teenager.  
  
"Why what?!?" Heero raised his voice.  
  
"Why did you love the one called Duo Maxwell?" The teenage voice questioned.  
  
A single light was now cast in the room. In this single light a single figure was huddled against his knees, a child, with a small chestnut braid, a simple black shirt and pants with multiple holes in the knees.  
  
"Duo reminded me that I was human," Heero answered, his voice lowering as he finished his sentance.  
  
In that single light cast, the small child stood as another entered the light. This new figure was about three years older then the chibi Duo.  
  
"Solo," the chibi Duo whispered as the one called Solo put his arm around the chibi Duo.  
  
Darkness filled the room again as the light was reabsorbed into the darkness.  
  
Heero stood there, silent with no words on his tongue, but awaiting whatever may happen next.  
  
Another light was cast into the darkness. Chibi Duo was cuddling Solo's head on his lap. Solo's mouth was bleeding and his hand was wrapped in chibi Duo's.  
  
"It's not fair!" Duo screamed. "Solo please don't die on me, do not let the plague take you," his voice changed into a whisper as he finshed his sentance.  
  
"Solo" Heero muttered to himself. "Solo and Duo, single and double."  
  
"Little one," Solo softly spoke, the plague was causing his internal organs to bleed. The blood that dripped onto chibi Duo's legs was of a shade that was deeper then blood.  
  
"Remember me, please." Solo coughed a few times strained. Solo managed to move his hand- clutched in Duo's- to his lips, lightly smearing blood onto Duo's hands. Solo's stregnth failed and his hand fell out of chibi Duo's.  
  
"The angel with a mop of brown hair," Solo coughed. "Wings wrapped around a bringer of death." Solo's voice lowered, "Purssian, chestnut braid. Please, keep my little one safe." Solo's breath stopped as the blood ran freely from his mouth and covered chibi Duo's lower body in blood.  
  
"Solo," chibi Duo whispered, again taking Solo's hand into his. "Solo!!" he screamed, throwing his head back in anguish, bringing Solo's limp body up to his own.  
  
"What's worth living for now?" chibi Duo whispered. "Father Maxwell, Sister Helen, all gone."  
  
Chibi Duo leaned down and rubbed his face in Solo's hair. "Why live?" Chibi Solo finally mumbled after a moment of silence. "Why live?" Chibi Duo screamed, tears flowing down his face and onto the body of Solo, making tear streakes in the blood.  
  
Heero felt things twinging in his heart, emotion. Even in this old pain, Heero remembered that this Duo was the one that made him human. Heero blinked at the sight of his Duo being so vurnarable, so human, so young.  
  
Before I even knew him, he had a life, was it worth living for?  
  
In front of Heero, chibi Duo's head snapped up, suddenly aware of other presences in the room.  
  
"Why did they have to die?" chibi Duo asked the presence that Heero could not see.  
  
"Am I that important?" chibi Duo used his hands to emphacise the point, with Solo's hand within his. He wipped his eyes with his unbloodied hand.  
  
"What about his memory?" the chibi Duo spoke.  
  
"Duo, two parts of a whole being." Chibi Duo looked down at Solo's dead body, obviously listening to another speak.  
  
"Who and when?" chibi Duo muttered, memorizing the details of Solo's face.  
  
"Another lost" chibi Duo spoke up into the air.  
  
"Decision?" chibi Duo screamed, jumping to his feet, accidentally dumping Solo off his lap.  
  
Heero felt his own fist clench, a thought had occured to him, they might be talking about him.  
  
The chibi Duo stalked toward a nothing in the air.  
  
"Play it out?" his voice vibrated in the air.  
  
"No fair!" chibi Duo screamed, shutting his eyes and falling to his knees, wrapping his arms around his lithe form.  
  
"Another chance?" chibi Duo whispered.  
  
"Why?" he opened his eyes to the other and unconscously pulled his braid into his front.  
  
"Who understands love?" chibi Duo stood and walked back over to Solo's dead body.  
  
He moved into a crouch, with Solo's head was between his legs. He ran his hand over Solo's hair and down his forehead, and over his cheek.  
  
"Two destenies?" chibi Duo paused. "We will be together, for something greater." Chibi Duo waited for a response, the silence was all Heero knew. Chibi Duo raised his head and smiled a secret small smile.  
  
Heero knew that smile, his own Duo had used it on him in the past. This single smile held more emotion than a passion filled night held.  
  
"Jealous?" a new voice pierced the darkness, almost making Heero jump in his skin.  
  
"Why should I be? Duo Maxwell had a life before I met him. I understood that, Solo." Heero's voice had fallen into his monotone, because it was familar and he needed that familarity.  
  
"Duo would have been much more to me if I hadn't died, if those basterds had given us the vaxcine, things would have been different," the voice of Solo paused. "He cried for me, as I will grieve for him when he dies." The voice of Solo echoed all around Heero, giving it essence.  
  
"Are you not dead?" Heero asked in pure sarcasm.  
  
"Oh, I'm dead," Solo's voice mumbled. "I never had my chance to be there with Duo, to  
  
experience the child that became Duo Maxwell, a maturing young adult." Solo's voice raised in volume as he continued his next tiarad. "What I would give to feel the extreme emotion he out pours every time he would touch my skin- each touch saying more words then that braided boy can speak." Solo let out a small chuckle. "Just to have him near me is as much of a single pleasure that I would be able to revel in. What I wouldn't have given to have him fill me as he completes me, and as I complete him. Just to be able to feel a single orgasm with that one."  
  
Heero felt something spreading in his veins, as if it was a liquid fire, the source of everything that made Heero Yuy human had become something so intense that he had no words for it.  
  
"Hn," Heero mumbled, calming that flame inside him, and again reveling in that familarity of that simple phrase.  
  
A small light turned a small part of the darkness into some semblence of life. It was cast on a bed. There were two figures on the bed, locked in the theroes of passion. On top was a boy with sticky brown hair, skin that glistened in the light with sweat, he was pumping madly and deeply into the one below him. The top had the bottom's two legs drawn over his shoulders. The top leaned down and claimed the bottom's mouth in a deep passion.  
  
"If I had been alive, that would have been me claiming Duo Maxwell," Solo's voice seemed to caress the very skin of Heero.  
  
"What I wouldn't give to feel passion, to feel desire, to have another's hands on my skin, to be pumping into another. To experience that moment when two seem to become one, when all coherent thought is gone and the only thing left is carnel pleasure." Solo's voice floated around the room, each word seemed to brush against Heero's skin. "What I wouldn't give to feel what a good fuck feels like!" Solo's voice had dropped very low.  
  
"Heero Yuy, if it was indeed within your power, you would have never let Duo become like this," Solo's voice changed into a whisper.  
  
Darkness settled back into the room as the light left the room.  
  
Solo let out a cry of anguish that made Heero's entire body twitch in reaction. Heero's eyes widened as he realized that something very bad was about to be seen.  
  
"Heero!" Duo Maxwell's voice screamed in the darkness, the voice echoed with absolute pain mixed with anguish.  
  
And then there was silence.  
  
Heero's whole body shook with that scream. He had immediatly recognized it as something he hoped he never actually would hear.  
  
"Heero," Duo's voice echoed, this time more in pleasure then in pain, as if remembering the feel of a certan lover completing him.  
  
Silence again seemed to echo in the darkness, and Heero blinked, knowing that the darkness would not change when he opened his eyes.  
  
"Heero," Duo muttered, the darkness seemingly stretched the word out, making each letter decidingly specific.  
  
"Heero," Duo's voice again screamed in a mixture of orgasmistic pleasure and pain.  
  
Heero held his breath unknowingly as his eyes widened.  
  
"Heero," it continued slightly calmer, "I can't fucken live without you man. How fucken dare you. I'd rather die then live with this knowledge."  
  
A single light was cast as Heero let go fo the breathe that he was holding. Within the light was Duo Maxwell sitting on a bed, fully aroused.  
  
"Dammit, I'd rather die with you on my mind then without an image of you to bring me to death."  
  
Duo Maxwell reached under his thighs and pulled out a throwing knife, sharpened to complete the necessary job. Irony was just that this knife had been one of his choice weapons when he had been a poilet.  
  
"I fucken loved you!" the one called Duo Maxwell screamed as he slit his wrists.  
  
Heero found that he could move and he ran toward Duo's bleeding form on the bed. "Duo," he said as he tried to throw his arms around Duo to stop the bleeding. "Duo," he muttered in true anguish as he felt a tinngling cover and cascade through his body as his hands went through Duo's form. Duo, laying on the bed had his arms spead flat with his wrists faced up and his ankles were crossed, his head falling toward the left side, as his eyes started to lower.  
  
"Heero," Duo softly said.  
  
Heero jumped as he heard the distinct sound of doors being broken open. Heero heard the frantic footsteps as another ran to Duo. The other form burst into the cast light. Heero fell to his knees as he recognized it as being Wufei. Wufei fell to Duo and gathered him into his arms, and started the process of stopping the bleeding. He wripped two pieces of sheet off and tied it to his wrists to stop the bleeding. Using both hands he pressed the wounds shut. Heero watched as Wufei bowed his head and lightly rubbed his cheek onto Duo's.  
  
"Please, Duo, I don't want to loose you."  
  
"Quatre!" he shouted at the top of his lungs, "We need a doctor here immediatly! Sally's in town currently. Duo's in immediate danger of dying, we need to move quickly."  
  
Darkness swallowed the light.  
  
Heero bowed his head to the ground and scrunched his eyes shut, as if it was possible to forget that image of Duo laying there, a cruxifiction, his mind whispered.  
  
"Why?" Heero calmly said once he found his voice again.  
  
"Why?" he said in his monotone.  
  
"Why?" he said a little louder, bolder, and emotion showing within his voice.  
  
"Why?" Heero pounded his fists twice into the ground accenting the single word. Heero stayed in his postition as he felt tears start to fall. "Duo, I would never have thought that you would have done that," he muttered into the ground.  
  
"It's not over yet," Solo's voice whispered.  
  
Another light was cast and Heero was almost afraid to look. Heero looked up after dabbing both his eyes with the back of his hands. Heero felt his breath catch in his throat as he looked into the light.  
  
Duo was on the floor, of what seemed to be a hotel room. Duo looked older, like the years had taken a fast toll on him. Duo Maxwell was laying there in a fetal position, naked, his hair cast over him.  
  
Heero stood keeping his eyes directly on Duo. He saw that his hair was sticking to him and that something glistened in the light. Heero recognized it and his breath caught in his throat. Glass, Duo's body was etched with glass. He took a step towards Duo Maxwell's body and noticed that he was still breathing. The glass was etched into his face, legs, and his entire body. Heero reminded himself to breathe and he fell to his knees. He looked closer and saw that his sheet of hair indeed had blood in it, but also semen. The semen and blood makes it cling, Heero's mind whispered.  
  
"Duo," Heero whispered, moving again closer.  
  
Duo rolled onto his back, moaning in pain, exposing his entire body to Heero Yuy's vision.  
  
Heero blinked and felt his whole body twitch as he got a good look at the damage.  
  
Duo Maxwell moaned a little louder in pain as the glass in his back became more finely etched, causing small pieces of skin to be dislodged from his body. The front of Duo Maxwell's body already had pieces of flesh removed. Heero watched as Duo's eyes contorted in pain as he tried to speak.  
  
"Why?" the word left Duo's lips in a soft rush.  
  
"Not now, but later." Duo's eyes began to lower, and he let out a cough, it was heavily tinted red.  
  
"Ai shiteru, Heero Yuy, always," he moaned as his last breath left him.  
  
Heero shook in his proverbial shoes. He could feel those last words in the air, lingering with a substance.  
  
Darkness and silence filled the air, letting Heero Yuy remember his breath and to calm his emotions.  
  
"Duo Maxwell died alone?" Heero monotonly asked the air that he knew Solo would answer.  
  
"He was never truely alone," Solo slowly answered.  
  
"Then where was everybody?" Heero slowly asked.  
  
"Alienated, the bitch queen made sure of it."  
  
"I don't understand." Heero raised his voice with that statement.  
  
"You are not meant to know." Solo's voice whispered.  
  
"Masaka" Heero shouted to the air.  
  
Silence followed for a few minutes, as Heero sank to his knees again, taking deep breathes.  
  
"Where was I during all this?" Heero finally asked the question- in six cautous breathes- that had been on his mind for what seemed like forever.  
  
"Two words: Relena Peacecraft."  
  
"Oh no." Heero whispered into the air.  
  
"How did I not know?" Heero turned his head towards the proverbial sky and took a deep breath.  
  
"Relena Darlian."  
  
"How the fuck did I not do anything about it, knowing now about it?" Heero demanded of the air around him, his voice rising as he spoke in an uncanny show of emotion, even in the arms of Duo.  
  
"You will not remember after you wake." Solo's voice spoke, causing the darkness to swirl.  
  
"Why can't I be with my Duo?" Heero found himself screaming. "This isn't fair!!! I wouldn't even be able to fucken know if he gets like that!!" Heero threw his arms up into the air in exasperation.  
  
"Not now, but later," Solo whispered, causing a final caress on Heero's skin.  
  
Heero frowned as he found himself shutting his eyes.  
  
When he opened them, he looked across the head of his lover, a slumbering Duo Maxwell, still wrapped in his embrace.  
  
"How could I forget?" he whispered as he placed his lips on Duo's neck and just suckled the skin there.  
  
"You will," Solo's voice whispered around Heero and the sleeping form of Duo.  
  
Heero held Duo as close as possible as he felt his eyes starting to lower.  
  
"Ai shiteru, Duo Maxwell," were the last words said, into Duo's neck they flowed.  
  
Sleep claimed Heero Yuy's body and mind, cleansing it of the nights' dream, only the days events and the remembered passion remain.  
  
-----------  
  
owari 


End file.
